


Rock Polish

by loquaciouslass



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms, The Legend of Zelda: The Ocarina of Time
Genre: Gen, darunia lov the rock, short fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-06
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-10-28 17:33:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10836027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loquaciouslass/pseuds/loquaciouslass
Summary: Ganondorf doesn't like Darunia, like, at all.





	Rock Polish

Ganondorf hated a lot of things about Hyrule. He hated the fat and self-satisfied king that sat upon his throne like a cow in the fields. He hated the princess and her sharp eyes, always watching, waiting, for him to reveal even a smidgen of his plans. He hated the servants who snuck around him, he hated the guards and their whispers, and he _hated_ having to play _nice_ with the whole smug lot of them. 

One person attracted his ire more than any other though. The king and princess, at least, had power. The servants kept their heads bowed. 

_ The goron _ did no such thing. He was loud and boisterous, storming through the halls like he owned them, always complaining about  _ rock shortages _ or  _ dodongos _ . As if they could ever be short on rocks! They ate rocks! It wasn’t anyone’s fault but their own that they’d become spoilt; as far as Ganondorf was concerned, they should shut up and deal with it. There was no room to be gourmands when there was a food shortage. 

Today, it was just him and Darunia in the meeting room. Ganondorf was glaring at him, as if the force of his stare could force some sort of action. Like an impromptu suicide. Or tripping over. 

“What’s with that look?” Darunia huffed. “I know you’re shady, no need to advertise it.” 

“How  _ rude. _ ” Ganondorf sniffed. “I am not shady. I have the king’s trust. Isn’t that enough for you?” 

“Nope. You might fool the king, but you can’t fool anyone else. Everyone’s seen you cackling in the corridors.” 

“You’re going to judge me on my laugh?”

“No, I’m judging you on the things you’re laughing  _ about. _ ” 

“Oh please. At least I can judge you for being a picky eater.” Ganondorf stood up to his full height, tapping his head piece and letting it catch the shine. “My people can’t be picky. Maybe you should take a hint from them and eat some rubble.” 

Darunia just smiled, the kind of smile that Ganondorf recognised a second too late, when his huge rocky hand snatched the gem off his head and held it glinting in his hand. “You said eat some rubble? Well I could just eat this tasty morsel-”

“ _ That  _ is a  _ treasure! _ ” Ganondorf hissed, fists clenched and teeth gritted. “It’s worth more to me than your  _ life _ , you pebble!” 

Darunia let the topaz touch his tongue, moaning a little. “Oh but it’s so  _ good _ ,  _ your majesty. _ ” 

Ganondorf roared and grabbed Darunia by the beard, feeling the little rocks crumble down his fingers from the sheer force. Darunia dropped the topaz and it rolled away with little more than a tap. “Don’t you  _ dare _ ,” He said, eyes burning and fingers sparking, “ _ do that again. _ ”

Darunia looked bemused. Ganondorf flung him away and grumbled, picking up his jewels and fixing it back to his head. It was dripping a little. He grimaced. 

“Geez, you’re a testy brat,” Darunia said. “I thought you hated those Hylians that wore berries as decorations. You’re doing the same thing.” 

“Goddesses, even if I  _ dislike _ them, I don’t try to  _ eat them _ off people’s heads. You’re disgusting.” 

“I’m also hungry. Pretty sure you have something to do with that, Gerudo king.”

“Baseless accusations will get you nowhere. Shouldn’t you be happy the endangered dodongos are coming back?” 

“ _ No _ .” 

“Well, that’s too bad. I’m sure they’re happy to eat those wonderful gourmet rocks you like to go on about.” Jewellery fixed to his satisfaction, Ganondorf turned back to Darunia, with a smile like a tiger, ready to pounce. “I’ve laid out my terms.”

“I ain’t budging. The king’s going to find out.”

“Too bad for you. I don’t want to be stuck in a room with a hungry rock, so if you’ll excuse me,  _ Darunia _ , I must be going. I have a trade route to work out.” 

Ganondorf let the door slam behind him. Ridiculous goron. His people would never be so uncouth. 

He hated plenty of things in Hyrule, but Darunia was at the top of the list. 


End file.
